Welcome to the inside of my head!!!! My journal is a place where I let my thoughts off their leash and they get to run free. Unafraid of what others might think, feel, or say. Here I will be sharing with you everything that is important to me. That could be anything from the state of our beloved planet to my new favorite nail polish. Do your thoughts have a playground where they can let loose and be free? I invite you to "gift" yourself and your thoughts by keeping a journal. You never know what new and fun things you might find in there.Tomiko

2009-01-21

I have been a spokesmodel for Maybelline for the past 9 years. Talk about a dream come true. When my agent told me that I landed the contract (which, by the way, is like winning the Superbowl, lottery, & absolutely LOVING how you look in a bikini), I couldn't believe it. I mean, it was Maybelline! Every model's dream is to land a cosmetic campaign. And they're lying if they say it's not. : )

Anyway, I loved being a Maybelline spokesmodel! And the first black woman that they ever signed to an exclusive contract, no less. I was ecstatic!

I got to travel the world, work with some wonderful people, show young (and not so young) brown-skinned girls that they are beautiful too, buy a house first for my grandmother and then myself, work as Maybelline's first ever Brand Ambassador (a role they created just for little ole me) and meet some very inspiring women through that role, and basically rest easy because I had no financial worries.

FAST FORWARD TO DECEMBER 2008.........

(insert dramatic music here), My Contract Was Not Renewed!

What? What do you mean they are not renewing my contract? What do you mean the Brand Ambassador role is being phased out? Wasn't I a good model? Wasn't I a reliable and professional representative of the company? What did I do wrong???????????????

I would be lying if I told you that I was not knocked on my ass by that news! Yes, I was aware that they possibly were not going to renew my contract, but I was "creating my reality" through positive thinking (isn't that what all of those books say to do?). I thought they'd at least keep me on as the Brand Ambassador. I mean, that role allowed me to honor women, on Maybelline's behalf, that were trailblazers in their communities. Come on, that's SO me!!!

But, alas, it was no longer meant to be. I could no longer use Maybelline to open doors for me (it was great when trying to book restaurant reservations). I had to let go of my dreams of building up the Brand Ambassador role. I would no longer be working with the amazing women at both Maybelline (and Gotham, the advertising company) that I had grown so fond of. And equally important, NO MORE MAYBELLINE CHECKS.

And you know what I did after I got the news (& after crying for about 90 minutes)? I went out to celebrate with my husband and my brother. You heard right, I went out for a lovely celebratory dinner with 2 of my favorite men in the whole world.

I celebrated the 9 wonderful years that I was with this cosmetics giant! I celebrated being the first African-American woman to land a contract with Maybelline! I celebrated all of the lives I touched just by my holding that position! I celebrated all of the great friends I'd made through that role! I celebrated how blessed I was to have had the rare opportunity to do something not many get to do! And I celebrated the "death" of something amazing, which meant the "birth" of something even grander was on the way!

When that realization hit me - something great leaving my life MUST mean that something even better was about to be born - I couldn't shed another tear if I tried. I actually scared my husband because when he left our room, I was inconsolable. Within minutes, I was up and raring to go! He thought he was in the wrong house! : )

So back to the title of this journal entry..."Maybe She's Born With It?....She Definitely Is!" I knew then and I still know now, I AM BORN WITH IT. And so are you! Whatever obstacles, challenges, dark times come your way, know that you have it within you (born with it) to overcome anything. When one door closes, another door has to open. That's just how it works. Why not get to the new and better door faster by letting the old door go?

Everything happens just as its supposed to. It has taken me years to really learn this lesson, but now that I have, I don't get knocked down for as long as I used to.

So who I am today, now that I'm no longer a Maybelline spokesmodel???

ANYBODY & ANYTHING THAT I SAY I AM! : )